Lindsiann has officially become my favorite youtuber. She seems to know exactly what I'm thinking and puts it in a video.
A couple of days ago I came across one of her video where she begins with "I'm not a girls girl" and I was very intrigued.
After watching it I can confidently say that I'm also not a girls girl and that this term is very much probably a sexist term and today I'll tell you why I think that.
Let's dig into it for this new gem!!
Hey clovers!
Before I start rambling about this new topic, I recommend y'all to watch the video on Youtube by Lindsiann, she definitely said things that I forgot to or said in a way that will probably get me misunderstood.
Ps. This post was really difficult to write and I'm editing it after one hour that ir has been up because I fear that it will be misunderstood.
I'm gonna add that the concept that was born with the girls girl term had the best meaning and it really was very positive, but when a mindset is so rooted in our head it is difficult t o take out. That is why as other youtubers and writers, I think that this term needs to go. It has become part of the problem and no longer the solution.
Being a girls girl is the opposite of being a pick me. Girls girl support and uplift women, no matter what, while pick me only care about men's appreciation.
After this, you would probably think that it is not a bad thing but the exact opposite, if only there wasn't much more to it.
Being a girl girl means to always compliment a nother women, always tell where you bought a dress, a shirt or your boots, always be acceptable, kind, never too much, be what they want you to be. Does this remind you of something? It reminds me of when women couldn't really say their opinion, they always had to nod and smile, be kind, gentle, never raise your voice, be the best for the society. Seems like that, no matter the era sex or gender, we are always expected to do this and that to be what they want us to be without complaining.
Let's get in deeper.
What happens if someone is not a girls girl? If it was really women positivity, nothing should happen, but of course, this is very utopic. If you aren't a girls girl you will be most likely insulted. This so called girls girl will record a video about you, post it probably on their socials and people would agree with them that you are a pick me, that you don't care about other women and most probably, there will be a bitch comment. This makes me think how much we hate the "smile more" comment we used to receive from men (and some women still do) but, how different is it really?
Why even when we try to do something that should support women it becomes the entire opposite?
Why is a girl forced to say where she bought a shirt just to be accepted as girl? Why we must compliment a women, make this genuine actions become robotics instincts just because they expect us to do it?
Shouldn't we fight the expectations? Why did we decide to become part of the problem and not address it anymore?
The fact that a positive term became part of the problem speaks volume of the society we live in, because the problem is not the term but how it is represented. It should be the most positive thing ever created but it took a very expected turn. We live in world with patriarchal roots, we cannot fake that we didn't know this would become toxic in somewhat way.
Complimenting someone only because you are expected to is not kindness, it is the entire opposite. Even more if you only do it to receive something in return like the info of where the girl got her shirt or dress when she doesn't have to say it at all since she doesn't know you. Maybe it isn't the nicest thing but it's surely better than making a video of it and accusing that girl of being a pick me and "not a girls girl"
I've always thought that labels are never good. While they define you, they also limit you to a role for your entire life. Labels are often connected with stereotypes, a huge problem in our society.
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